What A Day

What I did today is not planned. After class, I went for lunch with Davin. Ate at Sushi Tei, I ordered as usual, garlic fried rice(main dish $8) and add on 3 slices of salmon and chawanmushi(side dish +$5.80). I think the lunch meal quite worth it. Haha. Then ordered mango passion juice.

Ok after that, we went to Uniclo but the bottom he wanted wasn't there, too bad, so we left. Headed to the money changers. They're buying at 1.4! Lower pleeeeeeease... So I didn't change. :x

After that, we suddenly felt like watching Toy Story 3. So bought the 1:30pm tickets at 1:45pm. Yeah, we were 15mins late. Haha. After movie, before we go home, we shopped at FOX for some time. I guess more than 15mins. I've bought a cute T-shirt, shorts and a pair of shoes for my nephew! Hahahaha. They were having sales, so I've spent a total of $37 for 3 items. :)

Yup. After that, we really headed home. Before writing this post, I was cutting paper for C&L. I kept dozing off... Then suddenly, my sis-in-law called me to ask what I want to have for dinner as they're at Whitesands. I woke up immediately and ordered Subway, which I wanted to eat today other than Sushi Tei! :D So much fulfillment within a day.

But sadly, not much achievements for school work. I've not yet planned what I want to do daily, which I used to. I'm still doing work so slowly and my brain is as usual, so lost, unmotivated, uninspired and so stressed. :(

P.S. Can you give me a reply soon?

Waiting...

I'm waiting for an answer that will either make me extremely happy or extremely sad. I don't know what's got into me when you're not with me. I really can't do it alone. It is affecting me so much, both school work and life. I don't like to look happy when inside of me keeps thinking of you and feeling sad. I really need you back for I cannot go on this way. It just isn't me.

I guess I've made a wrong mistake in the past by letting go. But I didn't regret for I've learnt a lot. What's happening now is I hope to patch things up. It has all been changed unlike the past, the perspective of things will be different from now.

Need To Plan My Work!

Today I'll need to complete the skeleton work of my storyboard. I MUST, even if I am not sleeping tonight. Haha. But I guess I'll doze off during preaching the next day. Please forgive me. It is better than not attending yeah. (Thumbs up) Hahaha.

Tomorrow I'll take 20 mins power nap after service and lunch. Most likely reach home at about 2pm. After the power nap, I'll need to complete 2 models for colour and light module. If I have the aedditional time, I'll add in text for storyboard.

From Monday onwards till submission, I'll keep doing AutoCAD drawings. Things to do: Assign drawings to different layers according to CP83 standard, lineweight whether the object is cut, furthest or needs hatching, correct annotation and dimension with fixed text height and lineweight, linetype if it is removed, proposed, existing, overhead or hidding below a layer, plot style and title block. Cool~ I am targeting to generate about 4-5 plans, 4 elevations, 3-4 sections, 5-6 detailing. All the best for me!

P.S. I feel like asking...

Life & Work Conflict

I don't know why, but is there this curse that is (for what I know) affecting the EVD year 3 people? Either you're very happy or you're very sad. The difference is so vast that almost nothing can salvage it. Other than some of my friends, I am also a victim. The brain is confused yet with some understanding of something which sometimes that something is difficult to comprehend. For what I am going to say, you want support me or object to it. But please don't take it too personal and just keep it to yourself.

I have been struggling, if you were to read all my previous posts. Breaking up takes courage especially when you really love that person. I thought I was able to get over it very quickly but I realise that I can't, for I had never felt so heartbroken before. I know my school work has been affected. During the singlehood days, I kept encouraging myself that I will make it. However, it only last for a short while. I have been wondering, seeking a better solution, which I felt that the only solution was to go back. Go back in a sense that I have the companion I used to have, the person I loved and still loving, he whom I'll talk about everything to, he who is able to make me exceed my limit with school work.

I know I have friends, but they just aren't him who I have feelings for. I am thinking of patching things up again. Definitely, everything will be different. But at least I know I'll be happier than my current situation.

P.S. Sometimes what you've planned may not last forever, I guess I really need to let time decide...

Confusion Sets In

The mind without a thought, a soul without a body, a heart without a feeling and a spirit without life. I guess that's me now. I can make myself happy, but they don't seem to last. I can make myself hardworking, but it only make it for the first half. I can concentrate, but only last for a few seconds. I'm totally mixed up. Confused, annoyed, irritated, vexed with whatever that comes to me and with what I'm doing. That's just not me. I feel like grabbing you off my mind never to remember a single thing about you. But, its impossible.

About the previous post, I need to clarify some things. I fear to be alone because I know I cannot cope with work all by myself. Nothing else.

What Have I Been Doing?

Is it my brain or my heart that is making me unlike myself? It has been about 6 weeks now, my brain is either thinking of nothing or just thinking about you. Why am I no longer thinking about school work like how I used to in the past. Every time I'm free during bus journey, about to sleep, bathing or eating, I would have ideas for my work and that I'll think further if the idea would work. But now, I've lost that brain thing, I'm seriously not thinking at all or just thinking about you. Why is it so difficult. I can appear as if I'm alright everyday, but it is obvious to see the different work I produce compared to the past. I know there are people helping me, I'm trying too and after all, I'm still a human.

I don't want to give false hope. I don't like how people look at us (Noel and me), because to be frank, I still have feelings for KT which I know it has to fade. There is just no way I'll get on a relationship. I really thank you, Noel, for being there, but I always treat you as a good friend, like a brother. I really need to let you know that there's no chance at all. I appreciate what you've done for me. But everything is just too much for me to handle because you're doing too much for me. I fear to reject because I'm afraid to be alone.

P.S. My brain is still in the midst of turbulence.

Annoying!

Other than being annoyed by the fact that all the photos are gone, there are also problems with my documents. I'm still using Window Vista, where I can't open by clicking for instance, picture/music/documents from start button. When I click on the owner folder, there's always this window pop up that states location unavailable and it could have been moved to other location, which I have no idea where in this laptop/hard disk it is located. Frustrating, but I hope that as long as the important stuffs don't go missing, it doesn't really matter if the pop up appears all the time. Annoying... Didn't do any work today. Haha. Alright, tomorrow will be the start of school, lesson at 9am, Project 4 ends at 6pm. Everyday will be like this for 4 weeks. Yup. Goodnight. :)

Sad With A Bit Of Gladness

I deleted all the photos that I've accumulated since the first day I've recieved the camera. Everything is gone. Gone for good! How it happened was I copied the owner's folder into my hard disk which I didn't know that the folder's location is from desktop. Which means if I delete files from my own laptop, that same file will also be deleted inside the hard disk. They are the same and deletion is permenant! So I transferred the pictures happily into the hard disk so that I can free up some space in my laptop as I seldom view the pictures. Unfortunately and unknowingly, I've deleted ALL THE PHOTOS. It is not about the pictures, but the memories. I have copyri9ghts, family, friends and his. All is gone, gone for good. I'm definitely sad, but I think I should not dwell on it for too long. After all it can't be undone. However, I do feel a little glad that the past VISUALS have been washed away so that I can start afresh again and for my own good. Well, I guess this is it. There's no way I can turn back though it is really a pity, like a slight pinch in the heart. I'm semi-alright, but will get over it soon. Like I've always said, "I'm a human". Haha.

Holiday Is Over!

I'm missing in blog-tion for 5 weekdays as I was in school from 9am to 9:30pm daily doing school work. What a life man! I managed to finish my ArchiCAD modeling and also translated the models to many plans. Over the 2 weeks when school starts I'll be doing a lot of 2D AutoCAD drawings, where CP83 has to be included. I'll be taking another module, colour and light as well.

Yup. So on the last day of work, which was Friday, I went on a yacht with my family. We stayed over for a night and left the place at around 9am. I could still feel my body moving with the wave. Hahahaha. The yacht is super cool! It is able to carry a capacity of 20 people. It has 4 rooms, 3 toilets, a big living room, indoor and outdoor dinning area, kitchen, upper deck, front decking, back decking(platform can be lowered for swimming). Wonder how much is it? The uncle said from 4pm to 11pm, it will cost nearly 4500+ bucks. It costs 700 bucks for an hour and minimum 2 hours. Imagine overnight. Hahaha. However, fortunately enough, we did not pay a single cent as that uncle is my dad's good friend! Hahaha! So had dinner on board, went to fish secretly(caught nothing), talked, watched DVD, bathed, shet, basically, did the normal things when we're at home.

At around 9am the next morning, we left and then went to people's park for breakfast and after sending the family home, my brother and me went to fish at Bedok Jetty. I managed to catch a fish but my brother caught 5. -.-" After nearly about 2 hours standing under the sun fishing, we reached Carl's Junior at about 1:30pm. So we were fishing at noon, no wonder my face and arms are red. Haha. We bought back lunch and after the meal, we went down to wash the car. Too bad for my dad, as he drove to his work place after the yacht trip, so we only cleaned my brother's car. Haha. I'm currently uploading the images on facebook. :)

P.S. Should I play L4D2 at lan shop tomorrow? I've NEVER been to a lan shop. HAHA!

What To Do For Holiday?

Indeed, tomorrow is holiday! Guess what I'm going to do! It is only a week, so I am going to do ArchiCAD modeling for my work from Monday to Friday. If I manage to finish before time, I'll start AutoCAD drawings, especially in CP83 format. Hohoho! What a wonderful holiday! Yeah~ 8 weeks had passed and Project 4 is still on going, so once the holiday is over, I'll be taking an additional module together with Project 4, which I'm afraid that I don't have much time to balance both modules, Project 4 final submission as well as Colour and Light(Elective). However, I'm pretty glad that my elective is taught by Paul, who is teaching our course most of the time. He is sarcastic, but I don't mind, since I am someone who will not be bothered that much, easy coming, easy going, just be optimistic. Haha. Yup, I guess I won't have much time to enjoy as usual.

Right after Project 4 and Colour and Light, I'll have Saturday and Sunday to rest, maybe a day to shop for clothes for SIP! Yes! 19th of July, the first day of work. Had to report at 8:15am and end at 5:30pm. I usually wake up 7am even if there's no school! I'll have to wake up at 6am daily during SIP...... However, this isn't really a sad thing, because I know that I'll learn something, I'm seriously looking forward to it and I really want to show those people what I can do, thought not as good as them, I want to let them know that I'm willing to learn! :D I'm so excited now! Haha.

Just to update Friday, Saturday and today, I had bought a SEAGATE 500GB harddisk during IT Show at Suntec for $119. Then spent $60 on 2 tank tops (black & white, which I don't have), an inner tube, shoes, blouse and a T-shirt on Saturday then went to ROJAK organised by FARM (exhibition firm) at Emily Hill to listen to 10 presenters talk about their work till 11pm. -.-" So as usual, went to church this morning which was awesome! Then went to Raffles Place for lunch (something like Marchee, which I don't know how to spell). So my family had a card each, so ordered and the person tap in the cost into the card, blah blah blah. Yup, that's about it.

Ok. So I'm going to start some re-conceptualization based on the comments given during Interim so that I'll start my work immediately tomorrow. I will do it! I have the confidence! I'm going to take out what I've said previously that I'll not do well for Project 4, because I'm back! I'll just do it! Hmm. I think I can do some SketchUp since I don't have ArchiCAD software in my laptop. :D

P.S. 19th July, Changi uhh! Hahaha. :)

Tomorrow's Interim!

Ok. I have 4 plans, 1 elevation (editing now) and 4 sections with detailing (1 of the section I'm going to start later). Then I have 4 mock models, 1 final mock model, 1 A1 storyboard to show. Alright. I think I really have a lot. Need to do some planning here to remind myself.

1: Edit elevation drawing (Lineweight, Annotation, Dimension)

2: Draw one more section with detailing (Lineweight, Annotation, Dimension)

3: Storyboard layout (Business like, simple and neat because I want to sleep tonight!)

So I'm going to do my work now! Will reach school by 10:30am to print and mount! Cheering for myself and whoever is busy!

P.S. You're sailing or on mission now? Hahaha.

Eating Subway Biscuits!

Hello! I'm almost done with my first storey plan. Have started second, third and roof plan. Seriously, there are a lot more editing to do for those 3 plans which I'll be doing today. Other than plans, I'm also doing more detailed sections. For the elevation, I don't really like it. :x

Not only did the Subway biscuits make me happy, I'm glad that my interim is on Firday! This means I'm most likely able to sleep more tonight! Yeah! Good bye! Busy with work! :D

12am Soon

So I guess I'll be sleeping late or maybe not even sleeping tonight to do a 2nd-storey plan, some detailing and edit my 1st-storey, 3rd-storey and roof plans. I hope I can finish those by 9am tomorrow. It is my target for AutoCAD drawings.

I didn't post yesterday as I was busy doing my model till 2 plus in the morning then woke up at 6am to continue with the model which I managed to complete by 8:45am. I was also fortunate enough that my brother and the kids were going IKEA for breakfast, that meant that I do not have to hire a cab to go to school. Since they offered to send me and it is on the way, why not bring all my 4 mock models to school as Thursday's interim requires those. I still have some additional models that I forgot to bring just now. I guess I'll bring them on Thursday.

I'll be staying at home to do work tomorrow but I might be going to school to test print the drawings which I thought it was rather troublesome. :x Ok. Shall start my work now. Going to take in some caffeine to keep me awake. Bye... :)

P.S. You're so busy uhh. Haha. :)

Swing The Mood

I was sad yesterday, remember? I am in a ok situation this morning, I was happy in the afternoon. I'm so happy now! Because you talk to me in MSN. Hahaha. I thought you will not read my blog, but now the feeling of "are you reading my blog? I hope you do, but I can't confirm is it true?" is now gone! I used to tell you whatever I like/dislike, now I can only tell everything in my blog. So it really brings me assurance adn a peace of mind that I know that you know. I hope we'll talk like friends like just now again. :)

P.S. At least you're not avoiding me uh. :D

How?

How can you keep it so quietly and calmly. I feel like a failure as I pour out my emotions all the time in this blog. I keep mentioning about the past, how I feel and what I was thinking of, almost everyday. How can you do it alone, without showing signs of whatever. I wished I could just let it go and stop thinking about it. I am not used to the life now which I'm afraid that I might take a very long time to adjust my lifestyle without you. I know for sure that I'll not do well for Project 4. But I'm glad that I had 3 months of Internship after that. I hope that 3 months will be long enough for me to get back on track.

P.S. I want to end the misery of not being able to get use to my current state soon.

周杰倫 - 紅樓夢中

I don't like this feeling, the feeling of thinking back. This used to be the ring tone I've set in my phone when you first went for NS. Because of the different ring tone set for your contact, when it rings, I know that it is you and I will be so happy that I'll rush towards the phone to pick up. I've just removed that ring tone, since my phone's speaker is damaged and I doubt you'll call me. I really miss those days...

P.S. Still using the old number? :)

The Bridge

I was looking at the bridge from my room. The street lights have always been so glaring during the night when I'm lying down on my bed. I remembered that bridge that you used to walk so frequently during your school days. You would call or text me when you're walking on it and I would just stand near the window looking at you until the trees block you away.

My mother came into my room this afternoon. She looked out of the window, and she remembered you walking on the bridge as she watched with me that very day. She told me that I don't have to stand there and look at you and that I don't have to wait for you anymore. Well, they are memories after all. Whenever I look at the bridge, I'll think of you.

P.S. Still trying to move on... :)

I Lost 3KG! :(((

I haven't been weighing myself for a few months. The last weight I recalled was 45KG. I'm now 42KG! I wanted to gain weight, but ended up losing 3KG and so easily.

I didn't sleep well last night. I went down my bed a few times at about 12:30am because I was coughing. At around 5am the 2 pink pills that I've took has lost effect on me. My backache was killing me that I went down my bed to pop one, went up and decided to go to the toilet, so came down again. Soon, I vomited, but I had an empty stomach, so nothing came out. As I was vomiting, my whole body went weak and was cold. I thought to myself even if I faint, I can't faint in the toilet with the door locked. So I just stood up and breathe deeply. After that, my mother put medicated oil on my back, then I went back to my bed, still fidgeting then finally fell asleep. Woke up at 8:15am today.

It is going to be noon soon, I've finished my 3 plans finally. It was supposed to be yesterday's target. Hahaha. Alright. I'm feeling like normal now, no symptoms or discomfort. So shall do work already! :)

Ahh! Period!

Yeah... So there it comes, I'll have to struggle through the night again. Fortunately, I only have backaches which only last for a day. I'll be sleepy but can't sleep well tonight. I hope the 2 pink pills that I've taken will take effect soon. Really moody now... Hahaha. I always like to contradict my mood. Alright, so I was and still doing plan. I guess I'll do elevation tomorrow. Then section on Saturday. Won't be going school tomorrow as well, so I'll see my studio on Monday. Okay. Going up my bed to lie down and do work.

P.S. I was and still thinking of you, maybe because I feel uncomfortable now.

Buzzy Bussy

Week Planner:

Wednesday - Plans drawing

Thursday - Elevations drawing

Friday - Section drawings

Which I suddenly think that I won't be able to finish elevations or sections in one day. Should I stay overnight? NO WAY! Hahahaha. If there isn't a need to, I won't. I shall sleep at 11pm every night and wake up at 7am.


Ok. So for SIP, I'm posted to RSP Architect at Scotts Rd. 8:15am to report and ends at 5:30pm. Oh no! I'll have to wake up at 6am, leave house at 6:45am. Take bus to Tampines MRT station then to City Hall then to Orchard every weekday! Ahhh! So crowded! What to wear what to wear what to wear! Ahhh! >.<

...REST IN PEACE... Hahahaha. Must be steady, no worries. :) It is 10:45pm now, going to wash up then prepare to sleep! Goodnight!